I'll Have My Cake & Eat it Too

YESTERDAY:  113 lbs, 1,119 calories in, 550 calories burned
TODAY:  112 lbs!!

I really did kick that cake's ASS.  I ate a freaking 639 calorie slice of cake, with a scoop of light ice cream on the side I might add, for 5 days in a row starting April 1st AND I totally pigged out on April 1st and 2nd to the tune of 1700 calorie a day average.  I was 112 on April 1st, went all the way up to 115.4 and now I'm back down to 112 in 6 days.  Take that you deliciously horrible cake!  I really did get to have my cake and eat it to which is something I've trained myself to never truly believe.  Never mind all the anxiety I went through.  In fact, next time I should just do myself a favor and skip that part.  There will be a next time I'm sure because food happens.  Although not to the extent of a daily 639 calorie slice of cake but still.  I'm not religious but I said "Hallelujah" when I saw that number on the scale this morning.  This shows me that it's not the end of the world if I eat a crap load of calories one day.  I can fix it.   I went to the gym every single day in order to compensate which truly sucked but I did it.  I was so stressed out over something as simple yet not so simple as cake.  It sounds ridiculous really when I think about it but the anxiety was real and I'm not looking to repeat this scenario anytime soon.  It's very true that I didn't HAVE to eat it.  I could lie and throw it in the trash but truth be told I felt obligated and I did want it.  If I had it to do over again there is no way in hell I'd have invited that crazy cake into my house and if he makes one again for the hell of it I might eat a slice but I won't be nearly as committed as I am to this one since it was my B Day cake.  He'll be on his own.  Next year I will not have a cake like this beckoning to me from my refrigerator every day.  At least not on my account.  I don't care what hubby says.  He makes it healthy or he doesn't make it at all.  I'd have even been better off with the Lemon Cooler Cake that I love so much from Costco with 1/2 the calories.  So anyways.  Valuable lesson learned.  In a way it might be a good thing I went through this.  I did something that seemed to be a fate worse then death and lived to tell about it.  Something I thought would destroy me and send me into irreparable fatness.  Apparently I can maintain this weight, which is practically a miracle that I never imagined would be possible.  Not that it's always easy.  Not that I won't screw up.  But, as long as I stay the course it's possible.  

Last night's dinner was a delightfully healthy Chicken breast and salad.  I did have another piece of cake with my obligatory scoop of ice cream for dessert but I am taking a break today.  No cake.  No gym either for that matter.  Not that I won't have something sweet but it sure as hell won't be 600 calories worth.  I'll deal with what's left of the cake later. 

I am sitting here right now at work about to fall asleep and starving.  My stomach doth protest.  I still have to go get my hair done after work so it's a long day and I won't get home until about 7:30pm.  I have so much to do.  There is work I should be trying to get done during this last hour of but I'm just so dang tired.  I just got back from this boring meeting not too long ago and ate some yogurt.  I can feel my eyelids burning and if I don't get some sleep tonight I'll be in big trouble.   Staying up late to organize my closet was worth it.  I love it.  It feels like I'm in a clothing store with the white shelves and the clothes all lined up in their neat little shelves but it's not.  It's my closet and those are my clothes.  It's every woman's dream come true, and it was worth every penny.