Christmas was lovely. My husband spoiled me. He got me some really nice expensive gifts and I always feel like the biggest jerk when I don't get him as much. He's so sweet. I swear I don't deserve him but even so I won't let him go and I will be forever grateful to have him in my life.
I'm still fat and I'm getting fatter. I just reached a new high. 128.4. I'm so close to 130 it's disgusting. I'm at the highest weight I've been in a really long time and it's really upsetting because I feel that there is just nothing I can do about it. My food intake has been good. The only day I went over was Christmas. Everything is tight and getting even tighter. The scale only goes in one direction for me. When I gain weight it's here to stay. I have totally lost control. I lost it a long time ago. My superpower was being skinny and now it's gone. I've lost my super power and I don't know if I can ever get it back. It took me a really long time to get below 120 lbs so it may be a really long time until I'm skinny again. If ever. I hate my body so much.
I'm hanging in there. I'll get my metabolism tested next month and see where I'm at. If it's good then I'll feel more comfortable cutting my calories to try to lose weight. If it's bad then I'm screwed.
You have not lost your superpower- you will get it back, lose the weight you want, and get to where you want to be! Good luck with getting your metabolism tested- if it does turn out to be bad, the good thing is you can always do things to improve your metabolism and get it back to wear it use to be. Take care and I hope you have a great New Year!
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear you're having such a battle with the scales. You can get back to 120 one day, I know it. Good luck with the metabolism testing. I've got my fingers crossed for you. If it's bad, surely there'd be ways to fix it, especially if there could be an underlying cause like a thyroid issue. There will be a way around it, and things will get better. Don't lose hope. Wishing you a safe and happy new year xx
ReplyDeleteI understand battling the scales. It's so frustrating. I'm at my highest weight in almost 2 years. It makes me want to cry. I'm glad that you had a wonderful Christmas and that you got spoiled. Have a safe New Year.
ReplyDeleteXOXO
I hope the new year brings you a whole lot of good things. I hope that the surgery goes well, and that the test gives you the results you wish for.
ReplyDeleteI also hope that you reach a number you can be more comfo with..
Take good care of you and happy new year :)