[Day 4] The DAMN Shoe Box

Yesterdays eats:

• Breakfast:  PBJ, Coffee
• Lunch:  Tortilla Chips/Salsa/Cheese (work function left overs)
• Dinner:  Red Beans & Rice
• Snack:  String Cheese, Pecan Twirl

I was still hungry so I was going to eat some light ice cream last night before bed.  Just a serving of it so it would have only been 130 cals.  But, after stepping on the scale and seeing 118.5 I decided not to.  I would really like to maintain at 115 and not 117.5 because 117.5 is too close to 118 which is just a little too close to 120 for comfort. 

I told hubby I am not cooking a thing until we move.  Not that I did it all that often before but really, I am just so OVER living in that little shoe box.  The kitchen is too small like everything else and the clutter is aggravating me to no end.  I will not do laundry again until we move because I hate the laundry room situation even more.  I begged hubby to just put his things away since the condo is up for rent and I want it to be clean in case a prospective tenant wants to check it out but apparently it's just something he can't do.  I am tired of asking.  I am also tired of being annoyed by it.  This morning there was another random dent on my car.  I hate that fucking ghetto neighborhood and I will not be at peace until we get out.  I do worry that we move to the new house hubby might STILL refuses to put his things away.  At least there will be more space and I will be more at peace with my environment in general so that should help me to deal with it.

That home is not my haven like it used to be.  The place was always small, I always hated the laundry room and never did have a parking spot but at least everything was in it's place because that's how I kept it.  The kitchen didn't annoy me because cooking never even crossed my mind.  There are two of us now.  I wouldn't call hubby a slob but he isn't neat and organized like me.  It's been FIVE years in a shoebox so needless to say I have reached my limit.  I hate the moving process but thank god that we will be properly installed in a decent sized house that is actually large enough for the two of us by the end of this month so that I can function.  I am still screwed on the having to pay two mortgage situation but whatever.  I should be used to getting a raw deal by now.